Jason Curtis

Clearification (2)

Remember when I mentioned the brilliant product of the Demetri Martin/Microsoft relationship?

Here is episode 2:

I Feel Like Shit (A List)

Intro: I feel like shit.  Shitty enough to not want to tie together my thoughts.  I feel shitty enough to make a list:

1. Got ril high and ate myself stupid last night.  Fun, but now I'm paying for it both in mind and body.
2. For the past 6 years, I have always been on a different schedule than most of the people I hang out with.  So, tonight, I will not get to be Congressional Page Zombie as I had planned, but will instead be getting home just late enough to pass out. What an awesome Halloween
3. In about six hours, I will be pitching a professor on an idea in which I will produce a series of short films next semester for credit.  From an NC State point of view, it does a couple things for me: A) It will give me the opportunity to use NCSU resources, and the things that I have learned in the film program at State and apply them to a real world project.  B) It allows me to create a course of study that will closely mirror what I want to do for a living.
4. I need to do Biology homework (does that make any sense at all?)
5. I need coffee, but I don't know that my stomach can handle it.

We'll go ahead and chalk last night up to Gluttony.  Today, I am working on Pride.

McLaurin Parking - Raleigh,NC

I was perusing my financial records and noticed that a parking management company double charged me on two separate occassions this past month.

McLaurin Parking in Raleigh, North Carolina.

Watch out for these scumbags.  It was a nominal total amount ($8), which makes the headache and worry of faxing in documents, etc. seem pointless when I will just not park there again.   I know I need to do all of this because I called them and Doug Strauss was too busy to get on the phone himself.  So, through an idiot intermediary named Chelsea, I was told that the double charging program hadn't happened since WAY back in September and that double charges in October were not happening.

I can't stand morons.

So, McLaurin Parking in Raleigh, NC; I give you the 'Fuck You' Award today.  In a close second was the person responsible for me having to leave the house so that I can concentrate and the person that still has not cleaned up the chocolate they dropped on the carpet that I own.

How's that for passive aggressiveness?

Borat

An interesting article on the BBC today about comedian Sasha Baron Cohen who's film, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit  Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan . 

It appears that the people who have become victims of Cohen's enthusiasticly idiotic character, Borat, are speaking out. 

Part of me feels like if they signed a release under false pretenses then they should have a case to get out of the release.  But, I like Linda Stein's response, which simply-stated, comes down to whether she has enough time to worry about it.  She says, "I thought about it, I worried about it, and then felt I have to get back to my work. I just have to move on. I'm a New Yorker, all sorts of things happen in New York. I'm not angry."

The bigger question is whether or not Cohen's style of comedy is acceptible.  On one level, it is very funny and if someone is hurt by it, then they must not be that great of a person.  Bobby Rowe, the rodeo manager featured in the film is feeling the pain.  The problem is that, and no offense is intended to Mr. Rowe, these people seem like easy targets.  It was a fun joke when one of Cohen's other "let-me-interview-you-and-expose-how-stupid-we-are" characters Ali G came after Andy Rooney, Boutros Boutros Ghali, etc.  But when the target is simple-minded, or blind-sided people then some of the fun is taken out of the equation.  It is simply funnier to trip an olympian than a special-olympian.

Personally, I like my comedy better when I know that everyone involved can sit down and have a beer afterward.  When the punchline consists of trickery (and not even clever tricks at that) then I begin to suspect whether or not we are being fed the fumes from an empty tank.  Has Cohen run out of energy and intelligence with which to bring to his characters?  Was he lucky on his HBO series for seeming to draw intelligent connections and hilarious chaos?  Is the real Cohen about making fun of defenseless people? 

Questions that will be answered on November 3rd when Borat hits the big screen.

NCS(fuck)U

School is kicking my ass right now.  I don't remember ever having a week in which so much was due at once.  There are about ten different things I need to have completed by Friday.  Most of it is in my 'I Don't Give A Shit About This Class' category, but some of it is not.

So, before I get back to all of that, I wanted to share this moment.

In typical 80s-montage style, I was really getting into writing a review of an article about the effect of grizzly bear mortality rates on population gorwth and persistence when the iPod put this song on:

Talking Heads - This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody)

It was the perfect song for the perfect moment.

I'm stressed out and smiling...hooray for that.

Lifetistics

The United States recently joined China and India as countries with populations north of 300 million people.

That estimation is derived considering there is one birth every 7 seconds...
one death every 13 seconds...and one illegal immigration every 31 seconds.

I guess that leaving the country to feel safer every 7 hours, four minutes...being deployed to an Iraqi battleground every 3 days, 11 hours and seventeen minutes...and, waiting on a tech support hotline (and yes, that is now considered leaving the country) every 34 days, nine hours and forty-one minutes does not count toward the figures.

As disturbing as our exponential gorwth is, most disturbing is the stat that we will reach 400 million in 2043.  I will be 64 years old when that happens, which means that the prime of my life (27-64) will feature a 33% increase in the population of this country.  That makes me mad just thinking about...

Happy Days

For some reason I have been feeling really tired after eating for the past few days.  It is an odd phenomenon, but something that has happened before.

So, I am focusing on my diet as the main culprit.

There are some other great things going on today too:

1. Mister Diplomat.  A little late to do any real good on here, but I will be performing with Mister Diplomat tonight @ 9:30pm
2. T.O. was involved with THIS.
3. It was beautiful today.
4. I shot (horribly in both form and content) my first 'film' today.  16mm motherfucker! I am an auteur.
5. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

There are some shitty things though, and for this I will focus on one event which I witnessed since beginning this post which really struck me as odd, and a great example of the bad things going on right now.

I will begin three days ago when, while walking to Open Eye for some coffee, I noticed a rather peculiar looking man waiting for the bus.  I judged, perhaps incorrectly, based on the number of bags and general disposition that this gentleman was homeless.  I am still not sure, but I am sitting across from him right now (we just made eye contact, and I smiled at him -- he did not smile back.)

Just five minutes ago, this gentleman dropped his things off at a table outside Weaver Street Market.  He went inside and got something to eat (looks like some rice and vegetables, some water and an entire stalk of broccoli) and noticed that the full dining room was becoming less full.  He came outside to grab his things, and a typical Carrboro couple  sat down.

Now, the things that bother me are two-fold.  Both of them can be attributed to each of the parties involved (those being the homeless man and the white snobs).  First, the homeless man (who we have established may not be homeless, it could just be a theory, but I stand behind my hypothesis) proceeded to get very angry when he re-entered the dining area.  The first word out of his mouth was "Damnit!", and the second word didn't exist.  Now, at first glance -- this being the glance given by our white snob friends, this gentleman did not deserve to be acknowledged.  He was being rude and borderline intimidating.  But, I am also sitting outside, and if my heat wasn't working at home, or if I did not have ahome for that matter, I would be upset too.  It's supposed to be near freezing tonight and tomorrow, and eating in a warm room would be nice right about now.

So, what did our innocent white friends do?  Well, they sat down in the middle of three empty tables.  They could have moved over, they could have separated the makeshift four-top they had...the bottomline is that they could have accomodated this cold, homeless, angry man.  Yet, probably out of fear, they did not.  I don't necessarily blame them.  I do, however, believe that laughing about it was unnecessary.  I should say that I only know they laughed because the [homeless] man said, "Oh, is it still funny?!?" through the plate glass windows.

Coin toss. 

However, the guy's bags are now sitting outside, he is nowhere to be found, and in the few minutes it took to type this the snobbish white couple has continued their evening elsewhere.  Problem potentially solved, except that the dude is nowhere to be found.

The mean streak in me thinks it would be funny to hide his bags and leave him treasure map.  But that would be hilarious...

Google

Occasionally, I like to take a look at the referring pages that bring visitors to my little corner of the internet.  Today topped them all.  Apparently, if you search for ["huge balls" gay pictures hernia] my site comes up number one.

That's pretty awesome.

Growth

I like when things grow.  Here are all the things that involve me that are growing right now:

1. Corn
2. Radishes
3. Hair (more of a "being pushed out because it is dead)
4. Finger/Toe nails (see above)
5. CB
6. Relationships, Friend (upwards)
7. Relationship, Romantic (in a recessive manner)
8. Resolve
9. Stress Levels
10. This list...

T.O.O. Early?

There are just over 7 minutes left in the Philadelphia / Dallas game and 'sports' has triumphed again.  The fans have been well-behaved in terms of what has been shown on Fox's broadcast and T.O. hasn't done much of anything outside of pouting on the sidelines.

I had to remove myself from my comfortable position in front of my TV, but I am happy to report that drama has nothing to do with this game.  That is, off the field drama, as opposed to the natural drama created through the spirit of competition.

Time expires and the Cowboys are going to have the ball with under five minutes left with a chance to tie (or foolishly take the lead).  Philly is up 31-24 and what happened today was not a contained riot.  It was not newsworthy in any way that would transcend the news reporting of ESPN.  CNN won't talk about it.  Bill O'Reilly won't get his hands on it.  And Nancy Grace will not have a new legal case to abuse on-air.

Football is happening.  The game is the most important thing right now.  A classic game, in which the lead has changed four times with the early lead in the NFC East on the line.  This paragraph sounds cvliched, because it is.  Football is a tradition and a certain part of tradition is owed to the fulfillment of cliches.  Cliches can be comforting, and when they are combined with the smell of a distant fireplace and a perfect cloudy dusk, it makes things special.

T.O. may raise my blood pressure, but football season will remain truly beautiful. 

I just wish somebody had shot him today...